you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
