i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
