I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
