yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize