My nipple is on Facebook.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Randomize
