guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
