Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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