you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Randomize