respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
