just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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