Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Randomize
