We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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