sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
