I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
