I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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