did you get engaged???
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
