im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
