Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
