My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Randomize
