Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
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