Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
