i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
