I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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