Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
