So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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