Can Purell be used as lube?
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
