Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
