no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize