Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
