ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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