Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
