why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
