So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
The police scanner is talking about you again....
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
