I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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