i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
