"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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