I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Randomize