i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
two words...techno handjob
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
