It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize