You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
