I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Randomize
