Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
