i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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