just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
