Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Randomize