Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
