Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
