Ambien. No doubt about it.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize