You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
