I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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